Name of Governor – C. Hristmas
Date of visit: December 12th
Staff/subject area visited: KS1 Nativity – Donkey for Sale
Meeting to be reported to: FGB at some point but now that Ofsted have been and gone I may not bother…
Focus of Visit eg School Development Plan area
The Nativity is a yearly celebration of the birth of Jesus which brings together KS1 and their parents and family so that the latter can see their progeny dressed up as angels, kings, sheep, chickens, and so forth. The starring roles are ones, I imagine, which are keenly sought after. Baaaa. Humbug.

We are a Church School. Nativity matters. It is always good to be reminded about the story of the Nativity even if it is told through the eyes of a donkey. There is more to Christmas than chocolate and presents. We all need to remember this.

As usual pupils and children were fantastic. This is no word of a lie. The rendition of Away in a Manager was excellent. I love that hymn. They sang with clear voices and were indeed making a joyful noise unto The Lord. Same could not be said for the visiting littlies but they added to the mix and are after all a key part of our succession planning. Bless.

Pupils (and staff) demonstrated that the skip2befit sessions were working – lots of dancing and wiggling and rear end shaking. Very appropriate I have to say.

Key questions
As a Governor I am required by the Governance Handbook 2017 to ask challenging questions so here goes;

  • Where was the tea-towel? It is not a proper nativity without a shepherd in a tea-towel.
  •  Why does the school baby never grow up? It is left in the cradle in the PE store for 12 months at a time. This is a safeguarding matter and I will be informing social services immediately.
  • The donkey needed feeding – it looked very sad. Can someone not find it a bit of hay?
  • The angels depicted on the IT screen looked as though they had been partaking of hallucinogenic drugs. Is that appropriate imagery for KS1?
  • The sheep were molting cotton wool all over the floor. As this happens every year, why are we not using stronger glue? Are you that afraid of the COSHE regulations?
Apparently we have sold the school donkey before. This is miss-selling –  you cannot sell the same donkey twice to the same people and expect them not to notice

Congratulations for arranging real snow. That was impressive.

I am going for a hearing test next week. I could swear we were asked to applaud the Y2 incinerators.

Key learning outcomes – Board
If another Governor had attended I may feel inclined share my key learning outcomes but they didn’t so I won’t. So there.
Next steps and additional questions
Why isn’t there a KS2 nativity? #genuinequestion – surely Nativity is not just the prerogative of KS1?

If our school community really cannot read the information sent to them about how to obtain tickets then maybe we should hold the Nativity outside and see how they like it. We can collect monies for the homeless at the same time.

Ensure all governors receive advance notice in triplicate of all events at which their presents would be beneficial – yes, that is a deliberate typo.

Next year can we please sing We Wish You a Merry Christmas as this is a Gateway to Christmas song and it’s the middle of December and I haven’t heard it yet.




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